Today, after a month of deliberation and anxiety, with a heavy hand I signed my JET Participant Intent Confirmation form stating that I would be leaving Japan in August.
This was the hardest decision I have ever made in my life, bar none.
I have made pros and cons lists, I have talked the ear off anyone who came within ranting distance, and I have lain awake for many nights tossing up my options.
Even now, I can’t be sure that I’m making the right decision, but given a deadline, I had to go one way or the other and, as always, I’m walking away from the easy option and into a new adventure.
I still have six months left in my contract, and a lot can happen in six months, but it feels to me that I’m already counting my lasts.
My last Japanese oshogatsu (new years), my last hanami (flower viewing), my last sotsugyoushiki (graduation ceremony)…
Harder still will be counting the smaller lasts; last udon at Shinpei’s, last class with each of my students, last tequila shot at Amazon, last stroll through Ritsurin Park.
But I can’t waste my last six months being sad about them being my last, instead I will be making them glorious and sparkly and bright.
And who knows what wonderful adventure will happen next!