Beware of numbers

There are many pitfalls in the murky and dangerous territory of teaching elementary school.

For example, any or all of the following may occur while trying to teach first graders the numbers one through ten:

  • A student may try to kick a rubbish bin and get his foot stuck.
  • A student may eat her number card.
  • Another student may stick her number card to her face, rendering her unable to play the game.
  • One student may ask you what a question mark is then spend the next 20 minutes squawking “question” at random intervals.
  • Some students may find themselves confused between numbers and animals.
  • One student may throw his shoes as an expression of rebellion against the system.
  • Students may attempt to discover the limits of their vocal chords.
  • Desks may be upturned, and chairs tipped.
  • New numbers may be introduced into the conventional numbering system, including “sunny” “fine” and “hello”.
  • You may be required to act like a monkey jumping on a bed.
  • You may find yourself having a thoroughly awesome day.
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