Where did you learn that?

I love eating kyushoku with the kids, because I’m always guaranteed an oddball conversation. Today’s clowns were class 8.1 and I thoroughly enjoyed our chats.

Me: Shuumatsu, nani suru no? (What are you doing this weekend?)
Boy 1: I’m run!
Boy 2: I’m basketball club.
Boy 1: (points to boy 3) He fast run!
Me: Oh, wow, okay!
Boy 1: (still pointing to boy 3) He hiyaku (fast) me run!
Me: *blank look*
Boy 2: Kare wa watashi yori hiyaku…
Me: He is faster than you?
Boy 1: Yes! He is fast me! Okay, good! Fast!
Boy 3: *stares at table* 

Boy 1 and Boy 3 are playing janken (paper scissors rock)
Boy 1: I’m winner!
Boy 3: No.
Boy 1: I’m winner!
Boy 3: No.
Boy 1: I’m winner!
Boy 3: No.
Boy 1: *pulls fingers  with a look of glee* Fuck you!
Me: *chokes on rice*
Boy 3: Me too!
Boy 2: Chigaimasu! (that’s wrong) You too ute! (Say you too!)
Boy 1: *turns to me to check* ‘Fuck you’ okay? Okay?
Me: Uhhh…. doko de naraita? (where did you learn that?)
Boy 1: Okay! Fuck you! *goes back to eating* 

Boy 1: (out of nowhere points to boy 3) He is great!
Me: Okay! Cool! *holds out dessert* Soreja, kore iru ka? (Well then, do you want this?)
Boy 2 and Boy 1(who have already acquired extra desserts): Are? Are? Watashi mo iru! (What? What? I want it too!)
Me: But you said he was great, so he can have it.
Boy 1: (goes to the English teacher eating lunch nearby and has a whispered conversation then returns) Please look at him with warm eyes!
I flutter my eyelashes and simper at boy 2, to his great discomfort and the huge amusement of boys 1 and 3.

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